Another first has come and gone without Adeline. Christmas and the holiday season is officially over and Addy was so very missed throughout the holiday celebrations. We tried to remember her in every way we could, she was here with us in spirit even though she could not be here in person. I put so much thought into Adeline's first Christmas, knowing that it would be one of the most difficult events since she left us. Christmas has always been my favorite holiday, though I found it very hard to get into the spirit this year.
One of the first things I did for Addy was this memorial ornament. I have been looking online since probably September, knowing that I would want the perfect ornament, but had alot of difficulty finding one. In the end I opted to make on and designed this angel baby ornament for her. I also made one for all of our imidate family. Making, baking, painting and glazing 10 little angel babies was so very therapeutic and helped me to mentally prepare for the season.
We also entered a bereaved parents ornament swap. I made an angel baby ornament for a little boy in Connecticut with a surviving twin sister. We received this beautiful box ornament I was blown away by the amount of love and effort that went into this and We will be keeping it out all year long.
Sawyer had a blast making ornaments for everyone in our family this year. All on his own he opted to make this ornament for Addy. He put so much though into it and it turned out beautifully. I am so proud of that boy, he is such a wonderful big brother.
When buying stockings for Liam and my niece Brittany, our two new additions this year, I couldn't leave the store without one for Addy. It just didn't seem right not to have one. It was so wonderful to see her stocking hanging up with all the rest of them. Christmas eve we took down all of the stockings to fill them. All of them that is, except Addy's. Here it is hanging Christmas morning, not toys, no orange in the toe, just here to remember her.
After countless hours spent scrolling through every memorial and ornament website I could find, I accidently stumbled upon this at hallmark.com. It imidately caught my eye as this is exactally the picture I wanted to capture with Liam and Addy's first christmas ornament. They were out of stock online and so I posted al all call to facebook for people to keep an eye out for this in stores. Literally within minutes of posting a wonderful friend from college wrote to say that she had grabbed the very last one that Amazon had and it was on the way to my house. It made it just in time for Christmas day.
My dear friend sent these beautiful ornaments which arrived just in time for Christmas. I love seeing her name on the tree with her brothers. This is where she should be and always will be in spirit. She will always be the sister to the two most wonderful brothers a girl could ask for.
This was my Addy ornament for the year. A beautiful pair of ceramic wings in my stocking for my beautiful angel girl.
This was Liam's Addy ormanet for the year. Across the front of her gown it says "Guardian Angel 2012". This will forever be the year that he lost a sister and gained an angel.
Adeline's "A" is now hanging on the tree along with Liam's "L", Sawyer's "S", Brittany's "B" and my 27 year old "E". My dad has made one of these letters for every baby born into the family and I am so very glad that Addy got hers even though she wasn't here to see it.
This was my favorite gift of the year, and definitely the most difficult. Addy's "A" was attached to the front of a package with very familliar, battered wrapping paper, that I had caught glimpses of many times in the top of my dads closet. This package was wrapped up 18 years ago for Dobie, my grandmother. She died before ever getting the chance to open it. This Christmas we opened it and remembered her and Adeline, both forever loved and missed.
I know that there will be many more Christmases without Adeline. Many more where we will miss her and feel her absence as her brothers race down to see what Santa left behind. All of our happy moments will forever be tinged with the sadness of her absence. So for this year, Merry Christmas Baby Girl, I love you.
